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How to Cultivate Patience When You’re Running on Empty

Expert-backed strategies to help you stay calm and collected even when frustration is at its peak.

Patience isn’t always easy especially in a world that demands instant gratification. Whether you’re stuck on hold, waiting in a long line, or dealing with slow-moving traffic, frustration can build quickly.

But learning to be more patient isn’t just about avoiding outbursts. According to neuropsychologist Sanam Hafeez, PsyD, patience can help lower stress levels, improve decision-making, and strengthen relationships. So how do we develop more patience in an increasingly impatient world? Experts share their best strategies below.

10 Ways to Cultivate Patience

1. Practice Mindfulness and Meditation

Taking just 10 minutes a day to sit in silence or focus on your breath can make a huge difference. Kelly Davis, a mental health advocate, explains that mindfulness helps you become aware of impatience triggers like tense muscles or rapid breathing so you can slow down and stay present.

2. Use Positive Self-Talk

Instead of letting frustration spiral, try repeating a calming mantra, such as:

  • I have time. Everything doesn’t have to happen at once.

  • Other people are doing their best, and I’m doing my best.

This simple shift in thinking can help you reframe impatience and stay in control of your emotions.

3. Be Patient with Yourself

Ironically, learning patience takes patience. Davis encourages practicing self-compassion reminding yourself that you won’t get it right 100% of the time, and that’s okay.

4. Identify Your Triggers

Keeping a journal of moments when you lose patience can help you spot patterns. Is it certain people, situations, or times of day? Once you recognize your triggers, you can work on managing them more effectively.

5. Challenge Yourself with “Patience Tests”

Exposure therapy purposely putting yourself in frustrating situations can help expand your patience over time. Try waiting in a long line without looking at your phone or driving in the slow lane on purpose to train yourself to tolerate delays.

6. Become a Better Listener

Patience isn’t just about waiting it’s also about giving others time and space. Dr. Hafeez suggests making an effort to truly listen to people without interrupting or thinking about your response. This improves relationships and helps you develop patience in everyday conversations.

7. Pause and Reflect Before Reacting

Before snapping at someone or making a rash decision, ask yourself:

  • Will my reaction make the situation better or worse?

  • What are the possible consequences of my impatience?

A brief pause before responding can help you act thoughtfully instead of impulsively.

8. Try a Patience-Building Activity

Engaging in activities that require focus and delayed gratification can train your patience, such as:

  • Completing a large jigsaw puzzle

  • Reading a long book

  • Cooking a meal from scratch

These activities rewire your brain to embrace slow, intentional effort rather than instant results.

9. Keep Perspective Life Is Short

When impatience strikes, remind yourself that life is too short to sweat the small stuff. Jordana Jacobs, PhD, explains that understanding our limited time can help us prioritize what truly matters like relationships, purpose, and joy over minor inconveniences.

10. Reduce Overall Stress

Impatience often worsens when we’re overwhelmed and burnt out. Make sure you’re:

  • Getting enough rest

  • Staying hydrated

  • Taking breaks from technology

  • Setting healthy boundaries

A well-rested mind is naturally more patient and resilient.

The Bottom Line

We live in a world where everything moves fast, but that doesn’t mean we have to lose our patience. Practicing self-awareness, mindfulness, and intentional slowing down can help you stay calm even in frustrating moments.

That said, if you find impatience overwhelming or affecting your well-being, seeking support from a mental health professional is always a great option.

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