How to Prioritize Self Care as a New Parent

New Year’s resolutions often focus on self care reducing stress, carving out me-time, or simply getting outside more. But for new parents, even basic self-care goals can feel impossible. Between feedings, diaper changes, and sleepless nights, finding time for yourself may seem like a luxury rather than a necessity.

However, experts say prioritizing self care isn’t selfish it’s essential. Taking care of yourself allows you to be more present and emotionally available for your child. “While I think we now understand, on a logical level, that self care isn’t selfish, we have a lifetime of messaging from culture, society, and often our families of origin that told us that self care should come secondary to the needs of our children,” says therapist and parent Kaitlin Soule, LMFT.

So, how do you make self care happen when time feels so scarce? Mental health professionals who are also parents share their best strategies.

1. Rethink What Self Care Means

Traditional ideas of self care like bubble baths and spa days don’t always fit into a new parent’s schedule. Instead of focusing on what self care is “supposed” to look like, focus on what truly helps you feel grounded and recharged.

Therapist Dayna Kurtz, LMSW, suggests asking yourself: What makes me feel at peace? The answer may be the same as before you became a parent, or it may be different. It could be a workout, uninterrupted time to read, or even someone else taking over household tasks.

If you’re unsure, try writing it down. “Writing can stimulate a different part of the brain and may offer access to answers of which you were not fully aware,” Kurtz says. Once you identify one or two things that genuinely bring you joy, you’ll be more motivated to schedule them into your routine just as you would any other parenting task.

2. Find a Supportive Parent Community

New parenthood can feel isolating. Not only do you have less time for socializing, but many pre-parent friendships may not fully understand your new reality. That’s why connecting with other parents even virtually can be a form of self care in itself.

Joining a parent support group, a mommy-and-me class, or even informal meetups with other new parents can provide a sense of belonging. “Being around other parents who are in the thick of it can help reduce feelings of loneliness,” says therapist Christina Furnival, LPCC.

This type of socializing doesn’t just benefit your mental health it can also introduce you to a network of people who can offer emotional and logistical support down the road. Whether it’s swapping child care with another parent or simply venting about sleepless nights, having a community makes self care more achievable.

3. Delegate and Ask for Help

The reality of parenting and self care is that one often has to make room for the other. That means delegating responsibilities even if it’s hard to do.

“It’s not uncommon for parents, especially first-time parents, to feel that they need to be able to handle everything, but you’re not supposed to handle it all on your own,” says Furnival. Accepting help doesn’t mean you’re failing; it means you’re prioritizing your well-being so you can show up better for your child.

If you have a partner, communicate openly about sharing responsibilities whether that means ensuring you get a daily shower, a dedicated nap, or time for a solo walk. Family and friends can also pitch in by bringing meals, running errands, or watching the baby for short breaks. If you’re part of a parent group, consider swapping child care with another parent for an hour or two.

4. Consider Professional Support

If your budget allows, working with a therapist or postpartum specialist can be a powerful way to carve out self-care time.

“Therapy can be a designated and reliable time and space each week to sort through many of the challenges inherent in new parenting,” says Kurtz. Even a short session can help you manage the complex emotions that come with this major life transition.

If professional support isn’t an option, turning to experienced parents in your life can be just as valuable. Soule suggests talking with friends or family members who have older kids about how they managed self care in those early months. Their insights may offer you new ideas or at the very least, reassurance that you’re not alone in the struggle.

The Bottom Line

Self care as a new parent doesn’t have to be elaborate or time-consuming. It’s about finding small but meaningful ways to care for yourself, whether that’s through community, delegation, or simply redefining what self care means to you.

If you found this article helpful, consider sharing it or subscribing to our newsletter.